Wow, this piece truly clarified a perspective I've yet to consider. Society imposes different versions victimhood, but the harm is indiscriminate. Thank you.
Thank you, thank you for bringing difficult subjects to a world in which everything gets hidden in plain sight. The way you do is so artistically beautiful. The pain underneath these is like a soothing note saying “I see you” and sometimes, even if it was written for you, by you, the impact you bring is so valuable, you don’t know immediately that your readers are empathizing, but also finding that, they’re not alone. Your type of poetry is not meant to be palatable, it’s meant to be true. Your unique style is something immediately recognizable. I could tell this is your voice without reading the author. That says a lot about your gift. I believe that you are young, I’m not sure. But if you are? Your future as a poet is going to flourish so beautifully. You’re ahead of the curve. I don’t know if you’re a seasoned poet, but it feels that way. Strikingly so. When I used to write melancholic poetry, it was so raw and desperate, it felt like a stream of consciousness into poem form. That? Compared to you? I would say 1000% it’s what I wish my initial poetry was like. Those were my first poems, coming from pain. And I couldn’t have worded things so beautifully and aching at the same time, as you do. Please never stop writing.
i'm going to be completely honest - my poetry is mediocre and the thing with poetry is that if it isn't palatable, then it's probably not good (if people can't digest it - then what's the point of writing about it). i'm 20 - i am young. the thing is - my poetry keeps changing -> it doesn't really have a voice. i mean my vocabulary is the same or similar - if you trace it across poems, you'll find i use the same words, metaphors and other literary devices. not all of my poetry is from pain that i am experiencing - it's mostly just thoughts or ideas i want to explore to explain a part of myself. i think the main reason my poetry isnt digestable is because i, myself am not digestable. i dont like people and i hate playing a role as someone - which i think is a big reason for my lack of growth - i refuse to bend to being someone i'm not (i tried it but i rejected it). i think i will stop writing at some point but it all really depends on if i stop feeling the way i do or have felt. TL:DR i dont like people and i dont like appealing to people - im unfiltered and you can digest me like rocks in ur teeth or candy in ur teeth (depending on who you are).
I love your writing. It’s absolutely not mediocre. Let me show you something I wrote early as “poetry”
“I’m tired”
No amount of joy will compensate this
I always try hard but illness doesn’t miss
How many times until I give in
I just want to be done that’s it
No sleeping pills will do
Nothing will have me come through
Distractions can only do so much
I’m in the darkness again and again
I’m a garbage person I deserve pain
I’m stuck in a loop of distress
I’m so tired, tired of fighting, living
Made so many mistakes I can’t deny
This is karmas way of my demise
I want it to be done, or be numb
I don’t want to be saved, just end
I want to take my own deadly hand
Like I always knew I had
If God is real I don’t deserve forgiveness
And that’s okay, I only ask to be released
Release me from all my wrongdoings
Through death alone to stop hurting
Hurting myself and others
Others suffering from me yesterday
Many suffering from me today
Plenty suffering from me tomorrow
No one is safe from my despair
Handing out indirect goodbyes
Many feel the pressure of it come down
My logic fails me as if it’s shut off
My heart speaks for it in full
It’s not right what I’ve done
All the mistakes and regrets I’m undone
I’d hurt myself but that won’t do
Only the freedom of flatline
Will ever give me what I need
I don’t want to remember
I don’t want to heal
I don’t want to be heard
I don’t want to complain
I don’t want to yell
I just want to dwell in nothingness
Friends and family in the blind
I won’t give them all the details
I have it all and still miserable
I’ll let everyone down I know
Even if they’re unaware
Of all the things I regret
It’s not rumination, stable or not, it’s truth. I don’t even know who I am anymore. Let me go.
—
This poem is so raw it feels like just talking into a mirror. It has zero creative input. This is what I’m talking about. Your poetry, Eden, is a natural thing in you. It’s absolutely breathtaking. I don’t like people either. It all started from a place of pain for me. I honestly wasn’t looking for validation one bit. I understand that. And whoever gave it a single “nice” I felt like that was enough for me. I knew I wasn’t good. But this isn’t it. This isn’t your case. You’re gifted, if you have a hard time believing you are, it’s because it’s a moment of you being vulnerable to your current mental state. This is not necessarily easy to understand in the moment. I know that. But you are worthy of the compliments you receive, because they are true. You are incredibly talented, I don’t care if others have a hard time with the subjects you touch. Many of us need it, see it and find you to be masterful. I hope, that seeing my piece allows you to understand how far along you are in poetry. Please, don’t stop writing. And if you do, pursue other arts, because you have so much creativity in you. It’s so powerful.
Wow, this piece truly clarified a perspective I've yet to consider. Society imposes different versions victimhood, but the harm is indiscriminate. Thank you.
you’re welcome. thank you for such a thoughtful comment. that means alot to me
You break my heart in every single piece you write. 10/10
thank you for supporting me like every step of the way - you’re a legend twilight. thank you so much
Thank you, thank you for bringing difficult subjects to a world in which everything gets hidden in plain sight. The way you do is so artistically beautiful. The pain underneath these is like a soothing note saying “I see you” and sometimes, even if it was written for you, by you, the impact you bring is so valuable, you don’t know immediately that your readers are empathizing, but also finding that, they’re not alone. Your type of poetry is not meant to be palatable, it’s meant to be true. Your unique style is something immediately recognizable. I could tell this is your voice without reading the author. That says a lot about your gift. I believe that you are young, I’m not sure. But if you are? Your future as a poet is going to flourish so beautifully. You’re ahead of the curve. I don’t know if you’re a seasoned poet, but it feels that way. Strikingly so. When I used to write melancholic poetry, it was so raw and desperate, it felt like a stream of consciousness into poem form. That? Compared to you? I would say 1000% it’s what I wish my initial poetry was like. Those were my first poems, coming from pain. And I couldn’t have worded things so beautifully and aching at the same time, as you do. Please never stop writing.
i'm going to be completely honest - my poetry is mediocre and the thing with poetry is that if it isn't palatable, then it's probably not good (if people can't digest it - then what's the point of writing about it). i'm 20 - i am young. the thing is - my poetry keeps changing -> it doesn't really have a voice. i mean my vocabulary is the same or similar - if you trace it across poems, you'll find i use the same words, metaphors and other literary devices. not all of my poetry is from pain that i am experiencing - it's mostly just thoughts or ideas i want to explore to explain a part of myself. i think the main reason my poetry isnt digestable is because i, myself am not digestable. i dont like people and i hate playing a role as someone - which i think is a big reason for my lack of growth - i refuse to bend to being someone i'm not (i tried it but i rejected it). i think i will stop writing at some point but it all really depends on if i stop feeling the way i do or have felt. TL:DR i dont like people and i dont like appealing to people - im unfiltered and you can digest me like rocks in ur teeth or candy in ur teeth (depending on who you are).
I love your writing. It’s absolutely not mediocre. Let me show you something I wrote early as “poetry”
“I’m tired”
No amount of joy will compensate this
I always try hard but illness doesn’t miss
How many times until I give in
I just want to be done that’s it
No sleeping pills will do
Nothing will have me come through
Distractions can only do so much
I’m in the darkness again and again
I’m a garbage person I deserve pain
I’m stuck in a loop of distress
I’m so tired, tired of fighting, living
Made so many mistakes I can’t deny
This is karmas way of my demise
I want it to be done, or be numb
I don’t want to be saved, just end
I want to take my own deadly hand
Like I always knew I had
If God is real I don’t deserve forgiveness
And that’s okay, I only ask to be released
Release me from all my wrongdoings
Through death alone to stop hurting
Hurting myself and others
Others suffering from me yesterday
Many suffering from me today
Plenty suffering from me tomorrow
No one is safe from my despair
Handing out indirect goodbyes
Many feel the pressure of it come down
My logic fails me as if it’s shut off
My heart speaks for it in full
It’s not right what I’ve done
All the mistakes and regrets I’m undone
I’d hurt myself but that won’t do
Only the freedom of flatline
Will ever give me what I need
I don’t want to remember
I don’t want to heal
I don’t want to be heard
I don’t want to complain
I don’t want to yell
I just want to dwell in nothingness
Friends and family in the blind
I won’t give them all the details
I have it all and still miserable
I’ll let everyone down I know
Even if they’re unaware
Of all the things I regret
It’s not rumination, stable or not, it’s truth. I don’t even know who I am anymore. Let me go.
—
This poem is so raw it feels like just talking into a mirror. It has zero creative input. This is what I’m talking about. Your poetry, Eden, is a natural thing in you. It’s absolutely breathtaking. I don’t like people either. It all started from a place of pain for me. I honestly wasn’t looking for validation one bit. I understand that. And whoever gave it a single “nice” I felt like that was enough for me. I knew I wasn’t good. But this isn’t it. This isn’t your case. You’re gifted, if you have a hard time believing you are, it’s because it’s a moment of you being vulnerable to your current mental state. This is not necessarily easy to understand in the moment. I know that. But you are worthy of the compliments you receive, because they are true. You are incredibly talented, I don’t care if others have a hard time with the subjects you touch. Many of us need it, see it and find you to be masterful. I hope, that seeing my piece allows you to understand how far along you are in poetry. Please, don’t stop writing. And if you do, pursue other arts, because you have so much creativity in you. It’s so powerful.